When Traditions Change but God Remains
Like most military families, change is inevitable. Location, positions, and community are constantly shifting. Our family moved over the summer for my husband’s military training. We knew this change would bring challenges, but as a family, we chose to focus on the positives of us being together. This summer and fall have been marked by a yard full of butterflies, bonfires, and outdoor movie nights with friends, as well as quality time as a family.
Our time in this location is coming quickly to an end, and I am once again faced with packing up our lives for a new area of the country, a new community, new schools, a chapel, and new friends. There is a tinge of grief as we get ready to say our goodbyes.
If I am being honest, I hate change. My husband jokes that I would live in the same house and not move anything in it for the rest of my life, and be totally content. Yet, because I know God orders our steps, I get hopeful and expectant for what lies ahead.
It's funny that last week’s blog was on tradition, when so many of the customs we have developed for our family over the past 19 years will be set aside because we will be living in hotels and in transition, as many military families are when moving in December. So, what do we do when life looks different or when there is something unexpected that disrupts our holiday season? How do you gracefully lay aside expectation and rest in God?
I think the first way is to remember we are never really in control. We can prepare and plan to be good stewards, but then we need to let go and let God. “In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps” (Proverbs 16:9, NIV). I tend to want to control my environment and plans; however, after years of being attached to the military, I have learned I can plan, but I need to trust God with the outcome. “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6).
Although our family doesn’t get to choose where or when we move, we do get to choose how we respond. This is true for everyone in life, not just military families. On a practical level, having small anchors or rhythms that keep us grounded is important. These rhythms remind us that God is not put off by this vagabond lifestyle or unexpected disruption. He is with us—Immanuel—even when we are unsettled. This looks like family prayers before we leave the house, evening walks, and at Christmas, reading Advent Scriptures without the ornaments. It means releasing the deep-seated traditions for bare-bones ones that harken back and remind us of who we are as a family.
Finding God’s peace in a season of unfamiliarity doesn’t mean ignoring or pretending stress doesn’t exist. It means that you acknowledge the stress and the unknown, recognizing the tension that exists but placing it at His feet. God’s character doesn’t change based on our zip code or our season. He remains the same. So, when everything around me seems to shift, I look for His faithfulness in it. I recently heard a podcaster say she looks for “God winks,” those little signs that God sees you and acknowledges what you are walking through. Those can come through nature, a friendly gesture, a miracle, or several other ways.
Another way we rest in God is by giving ourselves grace. Transition is exhausting; emotionally, spiritually, practically. It’s okay if everything doesn’t look “normal.” Some seasons are for survival, not perfection. If the traditions don’t fit, it’s okay to set them down for a time. God is not disappointed; He is walking with you. He sees every box packed, every tear shed, every new moment. Resting in His sovereignty also means allowing yourself to not have it all together.
Resting in God invites Him into the details. This is not passive; it is an active way to remember His faithfulness in the past and to trust Him for the future.
With all of this said, I will put out a couple of downloads in the next couple of weeks, but this will be my last blog post for the year. We will be amongst boxes, U-Hauls, hotels, and finally in our new destination, a couple of days before Christmas. I want to leave you with one of my favorite Christmas traditions that points back to Jesus. On a personal level, each year I choose a new Advent devotional to read and soak in the coming of Jesus’ birth. It is a reminder to me that the Bible is one cohesive book, and it all points to Jesus as Messiah. As a family, we walk through the children’s Bible through Scriptures that have corresponding Advent ornaments that the kids unwrap and hang on our tree each night leading up to Christmas. Our kids are always excited to see which ornament and story is next.
Allow yourself to breathe a little this season and find rest in the coming of Jesus. Hold on to gratitude, even in the messy moments, and keep reminding our kids—through even the simplest traditions—whose they are. I can’t wait to keep growing together with you in 2026.
Prayer:
God, thank you that no matter what my holiday season may or may not look like, I can count on you to be with me. Help me to place you at the forefront of any tradition or desire for this holiday season. More than anything, I want more of your presence in my life. I choose to rest and find your grace in the midst of this busy season. Amen.
Reflective Questions:
What traditions do you need to let go of or begin this season?
Are you in the midst of a change, unexpected shift, or change this season that requires you to lean into God more?
How can you give yourself grace and rest in this season?
Traditions that point back to Christ for Christmas Time:
Advent Calendar, wreath, or Jesse Tree (We use the Jesus Calling Bible Storybook with Advent ornaments from Etsy)
Advent ornaments-read the corresponding scripture in a children’s bible
Find a local church doing a Live Nativity and walk/drive through as a family. Discuss what was shown/read scripture over dessert.
Birthday cake on Christmas to celebrate Jesus’ birth
